Nurturing Ourselves and Our Children

Taking care of ourselves is as important as taking care of our children. Here are a few things you can do
for YOU : Celebrate your successes

• Be gentle on yourself
  
• Give yourself hugs
• Take a hot bath
• Lie down, or just put your feet up
• Put on music you love
• Light a candle
• Set personal goals
• Find time to got out with your friends
• Make a "date" with your partner
• Learn something new
• Start to exercise and eat better
• Take a nature walk
• Enjoy the "little" things
• Focus on your strengths
• Believe in yourself
• Be patient with yourself; change happens slowly

In the most nurturing homes, we still have stress in parenting our children. Here are a few tips to help you reduce your stress or frustration. Remember that you are not alone when frustration turns to anger because all parents experience these strong feelings. A rule of thumb when your anger flares is to remove yourself from your children until you feel in control. If you children are too young to be left alone, call a friend, neighbor, or family member to help you. Reaching out for help is a sign of strength.

What follows are a few things that will help you when stress builds up:

• STOP in your tracks. Step back. Sit down. Take a time out yourself.
• Take five deep breaths. Inhale. Exhale, slowly.
• Count to 10 (or 50!) Say the alphabet out loud or sing it!
• Phone a parent help line or even the weather.
• Make sure you stand at least six feet away from your child when you are angry, unless their safety requires you to be nearer.
• Still mad? Run in place very quickly
• Thumb through a magazine, newspaper, photo album.
• Try to tap into your sense of humor.
• Pick up a pencil and write down your thoughts/feelings. Or keep a journal.
• Remember times when you have been this angry and handled it well.
• Look at you face in the mirror.
• Have a hot cup of tea.
• Do something physical like sit-ups.
• Close your eyes and visualize a place where everything is calm and perfect.

Reproduced from the Parents Anonymous® booklet, I Am A Parents Anonymous® Parent
2003 Community Resource Kit - Alaska Children"™s Trust